suffer2“It’s not fair. I’ve been a good person! I’ve never hurt anyone purposely. Then WHY is he doing this to me!!”

She was angry, anxious and from the tone of her voice I could tell she was exasperated by her ex husband’s behaviour. She had thought seperation  would have brought her peace, but he continued to hurt her in petty ways periodically, and she was unable to move on from the hurt he caused.

The cards did reveal a gentle soul who was here to learn certain lessons. Not as a form of punishment, but as way forward into greater growth. Pain would be the gateway to higher learning, like it is for all of us. With wisdom comes peace.

“Your lesson is one of endurance” In others words you capacity to withstand wear and tear. Like muscles that cry out in pain during strength training, with repeated use, our muscles get stronger and can handle heavier loads.

She looked up and met my eyes. “You mean, how much can I take.”

“Yes, and every time he attacks you with his behaviour or his words, you only get stronger. PROVIDED you LEARN why he’s doing it to you. By staying stuck with the pain, your soul stays where it is, by understanding his role in your life…..

“To make me self reliant, stronger and to learn to live with out him. I get it, he came to teach me how to live alone. And because I was so clingy and afraid, he would hurt me, until I learnt”

Sometimes souls dont even know they are here to be our teachers. Unconsciously they behave in a certain way or say things which hurt us. That hurt we feel, is the key to our growth. Our focus ought not to be on the wrong but on the lesson. And it begins the moment we start to ask why.

Her anger had subsided. I could see she was thinking of her life from a soul learning perspective. For one moment, she zoomed out of her life and saw herself a soul with a thousand lifetimes, growing, evolving with each experience – joyful and painful.

” I suppose the next step for me is forgiveness.”

I grinned and nodded.


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