Category Archives: Love

Don’t play with his heart

30 Friday Mar 2018

Posted by in Love, Relationship, Uncategorized

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Dear Girl,

He loves and you know it.

But you don’t feel the same.

It feels nice to be with him

drinks, dinner and dessert

But you dont feel the same.

Better you tell him sooner

Before you break his heart

Better you be honest

‘Cause someday he will find out

Better to have him thank you for saying the truth

Than feeling he’s been used.

‘Cause that’s not a nice feeling

and Karma will come around

Make you feel that way someday and remember what you lost.

 

  • Copyright Mita Bhan. 2018. All rights reserved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Giving space

16 Friday Mar 2018

Posted by in LifeLearnings, Love, Tarot, Uncategorized

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Sometimes in relationships, one partner wants a little time for himself or herself. Time to introspect, process their emotions, or focus on studies or work. Most often enough the other partner panics a little, fearing the loss of the relationship and starts to frantically message the person, and if ignored they turn to readers, to find out why he or she is not responding to their texts, or if they are leaving them for good.

With the Tarot in cases like the these, the message is always the same. Leave them be. If someone truly loves you they won’t forget you and your importance in their life. Just like fields are left fallow for a while to nourish and strengthen the soil, souls too need a little ‘time out” to recharge their batteries and gain perspective. Understand and respect their need for space. Trust that things will work out. By messaging them repeatedly we only end up creating tension in the space and sometimes it drives the person further away.

Just let go, give them the space. Make them miss you.

They’ll come back when the time is right.

Copyright Mita Bhan 2018. All Rights Reserved

 

MontegoBay

 

 

 

Quote

Don’t Look for Love.

25 Sunday Feb 2018

Posted by in Inspiration, LifeLearnings, Love, Meditation, Uncategorized

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Don’t search for the perfect one.

Don’t ask when, or who, or where.

Don’t look for love.

Let Love find you.

Let it’s mysterious energy knock you off your feet.

And that IS going to happen the day you stop looking and enjoy your present state.

Understand that the reason you are alone right now is because you’re meant to focus on other things, learn other lessons of Life and to tap into your inner self. And find the love within you.  Anyone else would merely be a distraction. Yes it feels like forever till they come, but it’s not. Forever is letting Love grow inside you and someday, suddenly, appear in front of you.

glacier

 

Mita Bhan

 

 

Understanding the Past with the Tarot

07 Thursday Sep 2017

Posted by in Love, Tarot, Uncategorized

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Nostalgia strikes all of us. It could be a song which triggers off the memories. Or just driving past a neighborhood from one’s childhood. Or a face that keeps visiting us in our dreams. Nostalgia is rather like looking over our shoulder with a question mark in our eyes. Sometimes it brings a smile, and sometimes a tear.

 

I know, I know, we need to live in the present moment and the Tarot, well, that’s what it’s based on isnt it? But what if we still had unanswered questions from the yesteryears? What if we wanted to know why someone came into our lives and left an indelible mark on our hearts that we still cannot erase, even after so many years?

 

Recently, I had the privilege of reading the answers aloud for a screen actress who was in town recently.

She turned to the Tarot to help figure out some things from her past. With her permission I would like to share an excerpt of a truly memorable and educational session with the cards.

 

“Why can’t I say goodbye to his memory?” she asked, and as I shuffled the cards, the card of ‘harvesting your history’ fell out. A very apt card, it spoke of learning from our past to help us evolve into better human beings.

 

Needless to say the rest of the cards which she drew out of the deck were as mind blowing as her original question. Together we interacted with the Tarot and with each card we turned over, we learned something new and sighed a little with relief until we came to her last card.  The card of Karma. That’s when we both smiled. Everything made sense, to her and to me.

 

By simply asking the question and reconnecting with his memory, she had completed a cycle in her learnings as a soul, and was ready for the next stage. Lena Dena was complete:)

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This was a true story of soulmates who united for a reason. And never forgot each other. How could they? They’d seen lifetimes together, and in this one, he came as her teacher. To teach her about so many valuable life lessons.

And she, came as mine. To remind me just how important the past is to our growth, as that is where we made our choices to become who are we. No choice we made is wrong. No decision we took is bad. It’s all part of the learning on this planet.

When He’s not a Family Man

21 Monday Aug 2017

Posted by in Love, Self Discovery, Tarot, Uncategorized

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“I’m 35. I want to settle down and have babies. What do I need to know about this guy as a prospective husband? Will we have a future together?’

Her questions poured out nervously as she sat opposite the cards. And when I turned them over, I saw everything but stability with him.  Reluctant to commit. Long gaps in their communication. Highly ambitious. Placing his job before everyone else.Sexual attraction but thats where it stopped. After reading out to her, I summarised “He’s not a family man”

“What do you mean?” she asked

I mean if you’re looking for someone who places his wife and children as a top priority, he’s not. Someone who’s a homebody, with a strong nesting instinct. Who will be a father, actively involved in raising your children, he wont. Someone who will come home to you and only you every evening after work, he would rather be hitting the pubs and clubs. Or hitting on other women. When you need him, he’d probably be in a meeting and wont answer the call. He cherishes his independence and doesnt see his future the way you do. Not interested in being tied down to conventional family structures, he wants to do his thing, when he wants to.

“Yes, he loves his space and privacy. When I ask him where he’s been, he gets annoyed”

More cards revealed a man of secrets. Who treasures and loves his private world, where he isnt answerable to anyone. And the more you ask, the more you push him away into his secrets.

Something in the cards struck a chord within her. There was a knowing light in her eyes. A rare moment of letting go of expectations . She summarised him beautifully “It’s not about me, or any other woman, it’s about him. Something in his past made him withdraw from commited, stable relationships. And somewhere, he’s not ready to be a family man at all. I dont think he ever will”

The moment she said that, I knew her connection with him would get better. The faster she understood his “no strings attached” attitude, the more she would accept him as he was, and release all expectations of wedding bells and babies and an apartment somewhere.  She had made peace with her connection.  And when she asked her next question, we both laughed.

“Will I find the potential family man?”

 

 

 

Love Can Never Be Perfect – A Parable

01 Monday Jun 2015

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Mulla Nasrudin was talking with a friend about his love life. “I thought I had found the perfect woman,” Mulla said. “She was beautiful and had the most pleasing features a man could imagine. She was exceptional in every way, except she had no knowledge.”
“So I traveled farther and met a woman who was both beautiful and intelligent. But, alas, we couldn’t communicate.” “After further travels, I met a lady who had everything: perfect mind, perfect intelligence, and great beauty, all the features I was looking for, but…”
“What happened?” asked the friend. “Why didn’t you marry her at once?”
“Ah well,” said Mulla, “as luck would have it, she was looking for the perfect man.”

The idea of perfection is a trick we play on ourselves. What is perfect? Perfect is now. Whatever you are or are not experiencing right now is perfect for you. When it is no longer perfect, it will no longer be now.

How to Lose the Love of Your Life

12 Tuesday May 2015

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In the past week I’ve read 5 women with the same problem.

“We were the perfect couple, everything was fine in fact wonderful for the first 6 months of our relationship and then he began to avoid me. Today he doesn’t even answer my calls. Why?”

Many of us have been through this mysterious phase in our relationships where after a period of hot, hot chemistry and connection, things suddenly freeze up. Until a point where we are shut out of someone special’s life with absolutely no answers. Very often I meet puzzled young women in a similar state who just want to know why it happened.

Here’s a few reasons why he may have retreated

  1. You began to mother him too much. As women we tend to nurture our loved ones and show our feelings by caring for their needs, cooking for them, checking to see if they are okay, making sure their cupboards were stocked. Flattering at first, most men seem to run from this kind of maternal behaviour. Remember, he has a mother and doesn’t need another one. Refrain from smothering him and realize he is a big boy who can take care of himself.
  2. Expecting a deeper commitment. After a point when things get intimate, comfortable and so right every woman starts to want to settle down. Men, however prefer to wait a little longer till they pop the question or think about marriage. You may have begun to drop hints, persuade him to meet your parents, talk about the future too soon in the relationship. Wait for the right moment and start the topic of a marriage as a discussion or dialogue, listen to his views before you begin to gently persuade him to tie the knot.
  3. Who, what, why, where. Though it’s nice to know about our loved ones, there’s a fine line between curiosity and concern and downright interrogation. After a point any man no matter how much in love with you he is, will want his freedom. And may begin to rebel where your questions are concerned, or avoid you altogether instead of answering the questions.
  4. His feelings were just not that intense. Many a times we realize the relationship just isn’t working out. Somewhere there may be a conflict of interest, or a sense of boredom creeping in, or something else may catch our fancy. Painful as it sounds it does happen. And few men will actually tell you that they don’t feel as strongly about you as they did, or that your stories about your relatives are beginning to get annoying.

Though closure is the ideal way to end of a relationship, most men would prefer to avoid the goodbye altogether and move on, hoping you’ve got the hint. My advice, try for a closure to find out why it may have happened. And if he still doesn’t respond, hang up and move on. Who knows, he may not have been the love of your life at all.

Mita Bhan

How to Lose the Love of Your Life

12 Tuesday May 2015

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“We were the perfect couple, everything was fine in fact wonderful for the first 6 months of our relationship and then he began to avoid me. Today he doesn’t even answer my calls. Why?”

Many of us have been through this mysterious phase in our relationships where after a period of hot, hot chemistry and connection, things suddenly freeze up. Until a point where we are shut out of someone special’s life with absolutely no answers. Very often I meet puzzled young women in a similar state who just want to know why it happened.

Here’s a few reasons why he may have retreated

  1. You began to mother him too much. As women we tend to nurture our loved ones and show our feelings by caring for their needs, cooking for them, checking to see if they are okay, making sure their cupboards were stocked. Flattering at first, most men seem to run from this kind of maternal behaviour. Remember, he has a mother and doesn’t need another one. Refrain from smothering him and realize he is a big boy who can take care of himself.
  2. Expecting a deeper commitment. After a point when things get intimate, comfortable and so right every woman starts to want to settle down. Men, however prefer to wait a little longer till they pop the question or think about marriage. You may have begun to drop hints, persuade him to meet your parents, talk about the future too soon in the relationship. Wait for the right moment and start the topic of a marriage as a discussion or dialogue, listen to his views before you begin to gently persuade him to tie the knot.
  3. Who, what, why, where. Though it’s nice to know about our loved ones, there’s a fine line between curiosity and concern and downright interrogation. After a point any man no matter how much in love with you he is, will want his freedom. And may begin to rebel where your questions are concerned, or avoid you altogether instead of answering the questions.
  4. His feelings were just not that intense. Many a times we realize the relationship just isn’t working out. Somewhere there may be a conflict of interest, or a sense of boredom creeping in, or something else may catch our fancy. Painful as it sounds it does happen. And few men will actually tell you that they don’t feel as strongly about you as they did, or that your stories about your relatives are beginning to get annoying.

Though closure is the ideal way to end of a relationship, most men would prefer to avoid the goodbye altogether and move on, hoping you’ve got the hint. My advice, try for a closure to find out why it may have happened. And if he still doesn’t respond, hang up and move on. Who knows, he may not have been the love of your life at all.

Mita Bhan

Love Lessons – Excerpts from Meditation

07 Thursday May 2015

Posted by in Energy Healing, LifeLearnings, Love, Meditation

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Isnt Love the most complex and compelling subject in the world?

The more I connect with the energies of Love during meditation, the more questions the Tarot answers about Love, the more I realise just how little I know about this subject. Over the past few weeks the majority of the Tarot and Psychic readings have to do about the various shades of Love in our loves. Some of you came asking about a long lost love, some wanted to know about whether they had found their soulmate, some hoped to find answers to a loveless marriage, and some just wanted to know if Love was coming into their lives. And I asked what is this thing called Love?.

Excerpts from My Meditation Journal

  1. Love comes when it wants to. Nothing and nobody on this planet can make anyone fall in love with us. And the only way we can be ready to receive love is when there’s adequate amounts of love within us. Love of self is the first step to attracting loving energies in our life. And it doesnt apply to single people alone. And it has nothing to do with being selfish or changing our wardrobe. Loving oneself begins with honouring who we are from inside, accepting our light and our shadow and becoming willing to operate from a source of strength and not fear.
  1. Love is not about changing the other person. Impossible. Speaking from personal experience, the minute I believe someone can be ‘rescued’ I am entering into heartbreak highway with no exit signs on the side. Love is about acceptance. You are perfect as you are. Just say it to a loved one and see how liberating it feels.
  1. Love is addictive, it is a high and all we do is hold on to the memory, the look, the connection. Our whole lives are spent searching for that happy high. But Love is not a drug for the low times. Love is oxygen, all around us from the time before we were born and it will endure for a long time after we die. The first step in learning about Love is becoming aware of the amount of Love already in our lives. By focussing on why she left or what he feels restricts our joy in Love. Love exists in so many shades, and in so many places. Discover what you love doing for instance is a way of tapping into the forces of Love. I’ve seen faces light up when I ask them “What do you love doing?” and someone says “golf” or “singing” or “I used to really love dancing” Or in my case “writing”

And finally as I try desperately to write more on the subject I remember the song “You Cant Hurry Love” by Phil Collins from the 80’s and laugh, because there is no crash course in Love and it’s taken me 40 years to reach to this point.

Mita Bhan

Lessons from a dying animal

22 Wednesday Apr 2015

Posted by in Healing, Love

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Our mothers were our first teachers of our unconditional love. And then came our pets. And when we became mothers we learnt too. But the love was only restricted to a few souls around us. This morning I knew I had to learn a little more about unconditional love.

And my teacher was a 14 year old Afghan Hound who’s in his final days. Probably the only soul I’ve met who receives healing without a single complaint about his aches and pains, his only concern which he communicated to me was will his owner be okay without him. His message brought tears to my eyes and also a deeper understanding of love’s mysterious ways.

Such selfless devotion, loyalty and unconditional love can only come from an animal. Love is timeless. Love has no form. And when you’re ready to learn, God sends his messengers. May this beautiful creature be blessed and may his owner be absolutely okay when its time to say goodbye to his trusted companion.